Is There Something Your Heart is Asking For?

They say the heart breathes, dreams, and has inclinations long before the mind catches up. That’s why I love this question:

Is there something your heart is asking for, but your mind has decided isn’t a good idea?

The practical mind is skilled at keeping us in check. It sets expectations, makes plans, and keeps us tethered to what feels familiar. But life—the most wonderful parts of it—happens in the flow. In the stream of expansion, play, color, and possibility.

And yet, we talk ourselves out of the things we want. We tell ourselves that dream isn’t practical. It’s too expensive. What will people think? Who am I to ask for something so big? I’m not ready. I don’t have time.

But here’s the thing—when we ignore our deeper desires, life grows stagnant. We lose motivation when our days don’t align with our most colorful dreams. We settle into comfortable misery, accepting things we know, deep down, are unacceptable.

Because change is scary. Desire is risky. What if we fail? What if we rock the boat?

But at some point—if we are lucky—our discomfort pushes us forward.

Maybe we remember that our heart has been whispering all along, nudging us toward something new. A slower pace of life. A garden to grow our own vegetables. A dress shop in Portugal. An Airbnb in Italy. A paintbrush, waiting to be picked up again. An open heart, finally ready to love.

And when we begin to acknowledge what we truly want, we can take a small, brave step toward it.

Because the life we long for also longs for us.

"Is there something that your heart is asking for?"

How to Build a Support System

On the road toward our goals—especially in the desperate stretches of spiritual wilderness—a strong support system can make all the difference. During setbacks and bad days, when doubt creeps in, one thing that has helped me is nurturing and building a network of support.

For me, this includes close friends, mentors, mentees, coaches, therapists, healthcare providers, and family—people who see me for who I am and who I’m becoming.

They lift me up. They listen. They offer feedback with kindness when I need it. They celebrate my wins and hold space for me when I struggle. They aren’t threatened by my growth because they have their own unique paths and passions.

They share similar values and worldviews, and they genuinely care—reaching out even when life gets busy. They show up in ways that feel good to me, making an effort to understand, to be patient, and to give me the benefit of the doubt.

When difficulties arise, they lean in rather than pull away. They know that relationships require effort, repair, and reciprocity. They know how to receive, but they also know that good relationships are a balance of giving and taking.

When you find people like this, nurture those connections like a garden. The more you pour in, the more you’ll receive. Because who we surround ourselves with, matters—not just for our dreams, but for the way we move through life.

I am a life coach based in Vancouver, BC. I love helping my clients create a support network. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions or are interested in working together.

#supportnetwork #buildingconnections #relationships #strogrelationships

Pink flower on a sunny deck

Who is Waiting in the Wings? Discovering Your True Self Beyond the Roles You Play

For as long as I can remember, I’ve played "the achiever." I threw myself into work, even as a child. I remember spending hours in my room, working away, only to emerge with my “achievements” in hand—a brilliant coping mechanism for getting the love I needed.

When love interests didn’t call, I dove headfirst into my next project, using work to distract me from the pain. Being an achiever had its perks, too: it attracted mentors who provided the nurturing I needed to thrive.

But lately, I’ve been asking myself—what’s the cost of this constant striving? Is it good for me to continually soldier myself to the door of exhaustion?

The Roles We Play

I’ve played other roles, too, like the doormat and the good girl. Anyone who’s ever been a doormat or a nice girl knows these roles can offer a version of safety. They help us avoid conflict, gain approval, or protect ourselves in vulnerable moments. But there’s a darker side—doormats and good girls are often susceptible to abuse.

At some point, these roles—achiever, doormat, and nice girl feel limited. They become exhausting performances, pulling us further away from our true selves.

When we stop and take stock, we may realize that we have spent so much time performing that we have lost touch with who we are. The questions loom large: Who am I? What do I want?

The Grief and Rage of Self-Discovery

Dismantling these roles is not for the faint of heart. We may feel earth-shattering grief for the person we could have been. We may feel rage at the years lost, the patterns we missed, the ways we played small to survive.

This process requires patience. It takes time, and the feelings come in waves: two steps forward, one step back. Compassion is key. We must be gentle with ourselves as we shed these old roles and step into something new.

Meeting Our True Selves

As we heal, someone remarkable begins to emerge. Slowly, we uncover our extraordinary inner understudy, waiting in the wings. This inner self exists far beyond the titles of soldier, doormat, or nice girl. She is limitless, one-of-a-kind, surprising, free, joyful, and ready to shine. She has been waiting patiently for us all along.

I am a life coach based in Vancouver, BC. I love helping people discover their authentic selves. Feel free to reach out if you have any questions or are interested in working together.

#roles #authenticity #trueself #overachiever #doormat #nicegirl #goodgirl #compassion #growth #selfdiscovery

You Have a Unique Personality